My earphones had this on loop when things went left. I couldn’t fathom what really happened. I spent weeks in denial, then months in sadness and eventually accepted that I wasn’t worth the fight.
After months of self-loathing and guilt came a resounding belief that I did everything that could have been done, you did everything that could’ve been done. Yes, I left and you can blame me for that and I can blame you for not fighting enough!
But we weren’t meant to be together, we knew that since the first time we met, right? I was the girl who’d overthink over things that didn’t require thought, the girl who’d prefer long walks instead of sitting in over the top places, the girl who had faith and you were the boy with a fire in the black of your eyes, you were the boy who was overprotective of the people you love, you were the boy who would sing and dance to music that was unbearable for my ears. But we changed, we adapted to each other’s needs and I always said that no matter how many traits you change, your core never really changes. You never really alter your core. And from love, it became something more complicated if there is such a thing. We became the swing that goes forward but equally backward too, our minds became aloof, and even though you and I were together but there were only moments when we really were.